I once took a personality test that said I should become a monk. I didn’t take its advice. Instead, I became a lawyer. Turns out, I am a good lawyer. And I love practicing law. But the monk in me has noticed a belief in our society, and in our profession. The belief is: “I do not do enough. I do not have enough. If only I did more, or had more, then I would feel _____ (fill in the blank: in control, at peace, good, loved, valued, as if my life had meaning, capable, safe and secure, satisfied).”

The irony is: believing that we don’t have enough prevents us from getting what we truly want. Instead of feeling in control, at peace, good, loved, valued, as if our lives have meaning, capable, secure, or satisfied, we feel controlled by others, disconnected, defective, unwanted, unworthy, insignificant, incapable, unsupported, and deprived.

What is the antidote to this vicious cycle? Appreciation. Appreciation for who we are, what we do, what we have. Appreciation is not just accepting things as they are, but cherishing things as they are. By cherishing I do not mean liking, enjoying, or pretending to do either of those. Rather, I mean holding close and cultivating with care and affection. Ralph Waldo Emerson said, “The wise man in the storm prays to God, not for safety from danger, but deliverance from fear.”

This holiday season, may you enjoy the peace and joy that results from appreciating all that you have, all that you do, and all that you are. You are enough.